Monday, July 26, 2004

As Long As They're Covering The IMPORTANT Stuff

From the Chicago Tribune "Daywatch" e-mail this morning:
Charlie Madigan on the return of Bill: MORE »
Ellen Warren on Kerry's whitened teeth: MORE »
Eric Zorn: Can voters trust the presidency to "a man who can't throw a baseball all the way from the mound to the catcher behind the plate?" MORE »

Policies? Platforms? Anyone?

Okay, I'm going to check these out, but Eric Zorn had better be careful. When you work for the same company that owns the Chicago Cubs, you'd better be willing to go out to Wrigley Field and throw a pitch yourself, just to see how "easy" it is. And to do it in front of thousands of spectators would be even better. Do you think he'd -- naaahhh.

UPDATE: Madigan's piece is all right. He writes about the tradition of front-loading a lot of ex-presidents and former candidates at the convention as a measure of respect, but also to get them out of the way and to make room for the new nominee.

Ellen Warren takes a chance to dredge up the Botox rumors again. Worthless. And if Kerry hadn't whitened his teeth, something would have been made of that.

Eric Zorn does about what I'd expected:

Can America trust with the presidency a man who can't throw a baseball all the way from the mound to the catcher behind the plate?

I groaned and swore last night when Sen. John Kerry (D.-Mass.) bounced the ceremonial first pitch of the Red Sox vs. Yankees game at Fenway Park, part of a surprise early appearance here in the convention city where he will be nominated Wednesday night..

With the nation watching on ESPN, Kerry, whose major message this week will be what a tough, strong president he'd make, short armed it .

His sissified toss died in the dirt in front of ceremonial first catcher, Massachusetts National Guardsman Will Pumyea, a veteran of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars.

Weak throws do sometimes afflict strong people. Earlier this year at Wrigley Field, on the day of Mark Prior's first post-injury start, new Bears coach Lovie Smith bounced the ceremonial first pitch well before home plate.

But, fellas, how hard could it be?[Emphasis mine. -G]

A week ago, before the Cubs vs. Cardinals Monday night game, a little boy with one leg got out on the mound and threw a strike.

Even now, I'm envisioning the GOP campaign commercials using footage from Sunday night:

John Kerry...Can a man who throws like a girl keep us safe from terrorism?

John Kerry...Coming up short in so many ways for America.

George Bush...America should keep its starting pitcher.

I don't know, Eric, how hard could it be? Like I said, I think you need to show us. Then, when your pitch bounces in the dirt, we can use it as an analogy for your lame blog: "Zorn started promising as he stepped up to the mound, but his post -- much like his pitch -- quickly went nowhere."

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